Whether the Jubilee government manages to fix Ali Hassan Joho or not,
on this certificates saga that has now morphed into a national concern,
the president will be left with a rotten egg on his face for one simple
reason: he publicly swore to “nyorosha” 001 governor for political
reasons.
So, it has not been lost on Kenyans that the frenzied alacrity with
which over five government agencies have descended upon the Mombasa
governor is obviously fuelled by the president’s desperate need to
“Nyorosha” Joho. This makes him come across as the pettiest president in
this side of the Sahara today.
As a matter of fact, there is no current Kenyan governor who is as
crazily popular among his people and beyond as Ali Hassan Joho. What
this means is that, when the president declares that he will “nyorosha”
Joho, in essence, what he is saying is that he will “nyorosha” the
Mombasa people, and by extension, the coast and North Eastern people.
Trust me when things get this thick, it is no longer about whether
Joho’s papers are genuine or not. Things have just snowballed into one
huge political vendetta and the one, who will end up being “nyoroshwad”
down at the coast come August 8th, is one Uhuru Muigai Kenyatta.
He (Uhuru) will definitely be going back there (Coast) to ask for
votes, in his re-election bid. While Joho’s votes are already assured,
the funny appetite to “nyorosha Joho” has rubbished any inroads made by
Jubilee at the coast, in one fell swoop.
I am beginning to love the president’s political advisors. These guys
are a bunch of geniuses, and just like anyone else, they might be
secretly getting tired of the Jubilee misrule in this country.
Maybe they (Uhuru advisors) silently detest the fact that the dreaded
Moi era tendencies of using state power to arm-twist opponents, are
slowly creeping back through the Jubilee regime. So what do they do? As
clever guys, they go ahead and cunningly mislead the president. This is
what they must be telling him:
“You must come out as a tough and no-nonsense president! To begin
with ‘nyorosha Joho kabisa!’ Just make use of all state agencies led by
your tribesmen to probe the authenticity of his credentials. As a strong
and decisive president, don’t waste time sparring with village
governors like Nanok, call him ‘shetani, ghasia ashindwe’ and move on!
They must have also told him that, “When you go to places like Kisii,
remember these idiots never voted for you. Don’t hesitate to remind
them that, ‘hamkutupigia kura but due to my benevolent nature, I have
made two of your kinsmen big people in government. One is a full CS and
the other a whole chief justice!”
Don’t you love the ingenious presidential advisors lately too? And
that is the short story of how Uhuru Kenyatta ended up as a one term
president in August 2017.
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